I’m not sure how this started… I was washing my face and my brain churned out his little gem. I hope I can, one day, work it into something.

Because kids aged 0 to 10 are convinced they are the sole center of the universe and other kids are presumptuously imposing on their story and ought mind their own fucking business.  I say 10 because by then, hopefully, they’ve learned that the earth revolves around the sun and that our solar system isn’t even the center of our galaxy, let alone our universe.

Unless they’re getting some weirdly religious education where they’re taught Creationism, all the verses to ‘Amazing Grace’,  and that Adam named all the dinosaurs.  What he named them we’ll never know since Adam never got around to creating a written language.  He probably named them super masculine names like Bruce, Brock, Conan, Chrome, Leather, Sandalwood… Hey, Adam was a dude!  He liked being naked and was quick to blame someone else for his own mistakes.  Eve, at least, was telling the truth: the serpent manipulated her into believing that the “one rule of the garden” was pretty much bullshit, and, even if it wasn’t, shouldn’t she really find out one way or the other?  Why just take God’s word for it?

Ok, so she phrased it poorly.

Come on!  Lady just wanted a little knowledge.  (How is it that someone always seems to find fault with a woman just because she tries to seek a little knowledge?)

And before anyone gets huffy, this is meant to be humorous.  I’m all about poking fun at ones own religion and the views stridently and ardently and manically held by others who subscribe to the same religion (which, luckily, in the case of Christianity opens quite a range of possibility).  But I don’t ever want to irreverently mock any other religion.  Don’t let me do that.


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